My Case For Poet Laureate

An Ode to the Internet

I ignore my job and kids
I even ignore my wife
I have let the internet
take over my life

I spend hours every day
checking out new sites
And I do it all because
my real life mega bites!


An Ode to a Dead Cat

I used to have a kitty cat
he was my best friend
And I have been so sad
since he met his end.

I’ll never get another
computer in my house.
You see, my kitty choked to death
when he tried to eat my mouse.


An Ode to Hogwarts

The Hufflepuffs work real hard
the Ravenclaws are smart
And those bold, brave Gryffindors
are very stout of heart.

The Slytherins are power-hunger
and can be awfully rude.
Who gives a crap, I just want to see
Hermione in the nude!


An Ode to Westeros

Khaleesi, Bran and Rickon
Tyrion, John Snow
I wish that George would write the books
before they’re done the show.

But I don’t think that’ll happen
that is what I dread.
But still I think it’s safe to bet
that they all wind up dead!


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